Wednesday, November 29, 2006 @9:20 PM
okays its wed oredy.well time really passes damn fast i dun even today was wednesday la.maybe its like th same thing goin on everyday.so yeah nowadays it seems t be th same.
so ok lets start wif las nite,soon after i wen offline i wen t meet jotham at his hse so tht i culd hitch a ride frm him.so yeah met him at like 1030 den left like 5 mins after tht.den yeah reached marina at 11.yat came like 5 mins after tht.so yeah he came wif ven n yeah we fished.so yeah started unpacking th things n yeah recieved a call.so yeah den after talked on th phone fr awhile den yeah bak t fishing. so yat caught th first fish n yeah jotham owe's him a stick.lol.after a few more catches jotham's bro came,so his bro cast th rod n phaap within 10secs he caught a fish.damn tyco la bt it was damn funny.so yeah after tht jotham oso had th same thing happen t him. so yeah we oso bbqed n yeah.n yeah had quite alot of fun,some funny things happened n yeah.so basically spent th whole nite there n yeah left fr home arnd 6. so yeah slept til like 3 plus stoned n having some deep thoughts fr hours.so tis morning i was expecting my mom t wake me up after my nap bt she didnt n juz wen off th stall without me.i think shes probably damn angry at me cuz i sneaked out last nite n yeah.
bt she doesnt understand tht nw im a teenager n i hv my frens n i wna go out.so yeah she gave me a scolding over th phone.n yeah she says i didnt giv a shit t even inform her tht i was going out.bt it is wen everytime i inform her tht i wan t stay out late or stayover she doesnt allow.den she says tht i dun care whether she wuld be worried anot n she says tht i dun giv a shit abt tis family.no doubt i admit i was in th wrong sneaking out bt she told me i dun giv a shit abt tis family it really really hurts me.i've been spending most of my time at th stall t help her n she says i dun even giv a shit?i giv her more than half my salary n she says i dun even giv a shit?wen i heard tht,i nearly broke down bt culdnt as i was in th public.so yeah controlled my emotions n acted normally.bt deep in i really wanted t cry,cuz she culd even say tht t me.she always look at me at my bad points n nt at my gd points.i dun mind tht bt everyday i get unnecessary scolding frm her n yeah i can do nth bt juz t stand there let her scold cuz shes my mom.bt whr can i release my stress at?sometimes i juz ask fr a small favour t go out she doesnt even allow me.is tht too much of me t ask fr?i really wonder alot?i oso dunno wd t say.sometimes tis is why i lose all th hope t carry on.i oso dunno hw t face her nw,shes outside nw bt i dun dare t go outta my room t even get water.so yeah i really dunno la.n yeah nw i stil dunno why i stil like her so much,its seems tht theres is nt one day tht i can get ger off my mind.n i oso dunno why wen i talk t her i feel so happy.its really troubling me la.i cant like control myself nw.n yeah stil liking her alot even though telling myself over n over again it wont work out n yeah.AHHHHHH!sometimes life can be sucha wretch.its doesnt always go th way u want.in fact most of th time it doesnt.damni really dunno wd t do nw.almost everything's in a mess nw.i really dunno la.ahhhhhhhhhhhh.FUCK!alrites i shall stop here.ciaoboats.-briann
