okays its wed oredy.


well time really passes damn fast i dun even today was wednesday la.maybe its like th same thing goin on everyday.so yeah nowadays it seems t be th same.


so ok lets start wif las nite,soon after i wen offline i wen t meet jotham at his hse so tht i culd hitch a ride frm him.so yeah met him at like 1030 den left like 5 mins after tht.den yeah reached marina at 11.yat came like 5 mins after tht.so yeah he came wif ven n yeah we fished.so yeah started unpacking th things n yeah recieved a call.so yeah den after talked on th phone fr awhile den yeah bak t fishing. so yat caught th first fish n yeah jotham owe's him a stick.lol.after a few more catches jotham's bro came,so his bro cast th rod n phaap within 10secs he caught a fish.damn tyco la bt it was damn funny.so yeah after tht jotham oso had th same thing happen t him. so yeah we oso bbqed n yeah.n yeah had quite alot of fun,some funny things happened n yeah.so basically spent th whole nite there n yeah left fr home arnd 6. so yeah slept til like 3 plus stoned n having some deep thoughts fr hours.

so tis morning i was expecting my mom t wake me up after my nap bt she didnt n juz wen off th stall without me.i think shes probably damn angry at me cuz i sneaked out last nite n yeah.

bt she doesnt understand tht nw im a teenager n i hv my frens n i wna go out.so yeah she gave me a scolding over th phone.n yeah she says i didnt giv a shit t even inform her tht i was going out.bt it is wen everytime i inform her tht i wan t stay out late or stayover she doesnt allow.den she says tht i dun care whether she wuld be worried anot n she says tht i dun giv a shit abt tis family.no doubt i admit i was in th wrong sneaking out bt she told me i dun giv a shit abt tis family it really really hurts me.i've been spending most of my time at th stall t help her n she says i dun even giv a shit?i giv her more than half my salary n she says i dun even giv a shit?wen i heard tht,i nearly broke down bt culdnt as i was in th public.so yeah controlled my emotions n acted normally.bt deep in i really wanted t cry,cuz she culd even say tht t me.she always look at me at my bad points n nt at my gd points.i dun mind tht bt everyday i get unnecessary scolding frm her n yeah i can do nth bt juz t stand there let her scold cuz shes my mom.bt whr can i release my stress at?sometimes i juz ask fr a small favour t go out she doesnt even allow me.is tht too much of me t ask fr?i really wonder alot?i oso dunno wd t say.sometimes tis is why i lose all th hope t carry on.i oso dunno hw t face her nw,shes outside nw bt i dun dare t go outta my room t even get water.so yeah i really dunno la.

n yeah nw i stil dunno why i stil like her so much,its seems tht theres is nt one day tht i can get ger off my mind.n i oso dunno why wen i talk t her i feel so happy.its really troubling me la.i cant like control myself nw.n yeah stil liking her alot even though telling myself over n over again it wont work out n yeah.AHHHHHH!

sometimes life can be sucha wretch.its doesnt always go th way u want.in fact most of th time it doesnt.damni really dunno wd t do nw.almost everything's in a mess nw.i really dunno la.ahhhhhhhhhhhh.FUCK!


alrites i shall stop here.


ciaoboats.

-briann

tuesday.


alrites sons n daughters today is like 3 wks away frm th day i collect my n lvl results.dunno whr i'll end up after tht man.really dunno.


okays lets start wif my day,was quite tired t as i was tokin t ppl on th phone til like 3 plus den i culdnt tank den i wen t slp.so yeah woke up was fuckin tired den go market den go stall den i straightaway slept on th table.woke up arnd 11 plus den did th usual things den yeah.

after lunch wen t th bak played cards wif my chefs den yeah finally i learned hw t cook properly.suprisingly i didnt burn anything.well well bt stil yeah i cant hold th wok steadily so yeah gna work hard on tht though.

evening was like almost th same den yeah helped den arnd 6 plus wen t th bak n take a nap til 8.den yeah packed up den wen home so yeah yeah.

okays i oso dunno,saying is fucking easy la.tot tht i can really forget her bt fuck man i really cant.i tink shes like dunno hw t say la quite hard t forget.quite sian though.aiyah i oso duno wd t say la.i like her til like dunno hw t say la.fucking sian1/2.so yeah hopefully i'll come out wif a solution soon.cuz yeah tis cant really go on forever.so yeah til den i stil like her loads.hahah.


okays stop here oredy.

ciaoboats every1.

-briann'

okok today finally i post early,ok so today began th new wk bt wif a bad start.business wasnt good at all in fact it was bad.haiz.den yeah did th same thing in th morning til th end of lunch time.den yeah practiced tossing on th wok n yeah find it quite easy nw after a few wks of hard training.bt stil i cant turn th wok properly i think maybe its bcuz my finger power is too weak.

so yeah did tht til like evening time wen th dinner crowd comes in.den yeah my mom once again pissed me off.ask her clearly 3 times where is th guy bt stil she directed me t th wrong table n scolded me.den yeah culd only sit there n cant retaliate cuz if i do i wuld nt noe wd th consequences wuld be.so i wen t th bak n take a smoke n yeah felt slightly better bt stil feeling quite fucked up so yeah smoked n smoked den wen t take a break at th bak.den yeah cooled down n wen bak t th front n yeah.den saw my dad buying th chefs 2 bottles of beers was quite surprised so yeah suspected something.so wen t th bak talked t them n found out he striked lottery.it was quite a few Ks bt wen i asked him he act dumb n say oh once in a while cia them.so yeah wondering why is he such a selfish bastard.hes fucking useless n i oso dunno wd t say la.juz fucking dissappointed la.got too many things t say bt words juz cant express it.hai.

so yeah reached home den yeah relaxed fr awhile,toked t my sis n broinlaw den yeah.so yeah wen in t check my hp cuz i heard th missed call/msg beep tone.den yeah saw jiayi's no. so yeah den called her.den yeah she had problems wif dom n yeah gotta admit im th main cause of it.cuz if i didnt tel dom wd t say nth wuld actually happen cuz even if dom were t msg himself he wuldnt type as harshly as wad i said.so yeah haiz so ermmmm yeah she said tht she wont forgive dom n yeah so told her juz t forgive dom n yeah den blocked her.den dom's oso idiot saying tht he cant be fucked.so yalah i oso dunno wd t say la.so nw tokin t dom on th phone n yeah oso dunno wd t do la.


aiyah so yeah i think tis is gna be th starting of th ending of my liking of her.dunno yeah in a sense its better i THINK.hahah.dunno whether isit th right choice anot.aiyah i oso dunno whether really i wuld stop liking anot.fucking really like her alot la.sian la.really sian la.aiyah put all these things aside ba.

alrites i shal stop here.

ciaoboats.
-briann'

sometimes i feel like i dun hav a partner
sometimes i feel like my only fren
is th city i live in
loney as i am
together we cry.
i dun ever wanna feel like i did that day
take me t place i love
take me all the way.
full of broken thoughts
i cannot repair.
what hav i become
my SWEETEST frens
dun make me feel like giving up
good humour is th health of soul,
sadness is its poison

People
You can never change the way they feel
Better let them do just what they will
For they willIf you let them
Steal your heart from you
PeopleWill always make a lover feel a fool
But you knew I loved you
I should have seen love through

You are far
I'm never gonna be your star
I'll pick up the pieces
to mend my heart
But remember this
Long as we both live
when you need the hand of another man
one you really can surrender with
I will wait for you like I always do
there's something there
that can't compare with any other

You're lovely, with your smile so warm
And your cheeks so soft
There is nothing for me
but to love you
With each word your tenderness grows
Tearing my fears apart
And that laugh that wrinkles your nose
It touches my foolish foolish heart

I can only give you love that lasts forever,
And a promise to be near each time you call.
And the only heart I own
For you and you alone

hihhi soot nia im bak t posting,past few days was too tired to den phaaap go sleep.


okok so lets start wif friday.ermmmm as usual wen t my mom's stall t help.bt tis wk was a fucking bad wk cuz business has been bad.didnt even manage t break even.sian1/2 so yeah friday did th same routine den afternoon continued learning frm th chef hw t cook.hahah nw can learn hw t toss oredy.quite hard la oso dunno why i can toss holding th wok in th air bt nt on th stove.bt yeah gna practice cuz practice makes perfect.so yeah practiced n practiced den tok cock den work den go home.den bathed den after tht talked t dom fr awhile.he can be such a idiot at times,told him tht i was toking seriously den he stil anyhow whack.so yeah talked t him bout a few things n yeah den wen t slp.

sat.woke up 12 plus den delayed til like 2 plus den left my hse t meet casey at his hse.den after tht slacked fr awhile den it started raining so we decided t play wif th ps2 den play play play play until 5 plus den we forgot tht we had t meet xw.bt gotta admit PES is fucking fun.hahah den phaaaaap merepe took a cab down n meet him.bt by th time we reached it was too late n he did nt hav enough time t play den casey n i played 1v1 cuz everyone else either playing o2jam or dont wan t play.town was quite empty today.so yeah played 2 games of 1v1 den casey had t go den yeah wen t makan wif yat n kw cuz th rest had left.after makaning we wen bak dome t challenge ppl den phaaaaap got a challenge bt it was 3v4 den after 5 mins later amir came so it was 4v4.den phaaaaap we whooped their candy ass.hahaha was quite a fun match.den after tht played uther's party it was fucking fun la den play til like 1030 den we all left.so yeah shared a cab home wif kw.den yeah wen home bathed den logged msn,checked mail,friendster etc. den after tht jia called me den talk cock fr awhile den phaaap i fell asleep hahah.den yat asked me whether wan t go pasir ris crabbing den we asked jia den phaap he said tmr morning den tel us.

sunday.
so yeah woke up like 12plus cuz yatty's msg woke me up.den msged jia den he say cant come den keep persuading den he said arnd 4 plus he cal us bak.den phaaap 5 plus he msged say he cant come.den sian1/2 onli yat n i were there.so yeah fished n fished,tok cock n tok cock etc.den arnd 7 plus came tis fucker anyhow sia he,fucking he anyhow cast den kena our line fucking alot of times la.cb sian den keep having t untie n untie.after tht onli caught one fish den phaap i had t go home cuz of time constrains.so yeah booked a cab den chionged home.reach home bathe watch tv fr awhile den bathed den yeah im here blogging nw.dunno wd time gna sleep,damn bored nw.so yeah thinking of something t do.so yeah slacking jacking nw.


okok dunno why im repeating myself bt yeah think tht if i dun say it out i cant tank.cb fucking hell i stil like her a hell lot.its really damn dumb la.she oredy had told me tht we only could be bestest best frens bt yeah here am i stil liking her.cb dumb la.walan eh wonder wen i'll get over her.think tht it wuld be a long long time more.ohwells fr nw better nt do anything stupid.


okok i shall stop posting oredy.gotta do other stuff.

so yeah ciaoboats!

-briann'

thursday oredy.


well well today's oredy thurs damn fast la.time really passes very fast.i had oredy completed my part time n yeah bak t helping my mom at th stall.nw as usual looking fr more part-time.tryin t help tis family as much as possible.haiz sian

so today did th same thing blah blah blah.bt business hasnt been good at all.in fact it has been bad.fucking bad.cant even cover up costs n we're losing money again.its really quite sian t see tht juz as wen i tot tht things were gg t change fr th better it suddenly juz came t a halt.i oso dunno wd t do nw.things are really bad nw.sian1/2.so yeah afternoon continued t practise holding th wok n stuff.den yeah slacked n slacked den yeah time t go home.
i oso dunno whether i shud head tis path tht i dun wna walk,although its gna ruin my future bt as long as u provides me money fast i dun mind.i really dunno whr i'll head t.my mind nw is really in a whirl.i really dunno whr im gg la.feeling damn helpless nw n fucked up la.

th person i like nw is oso goin thru quite a few problems.i noe i can help her n wna be th one t stand by her n lend her a shoulder wen she nds one bt i noe its nt gg t come tht we'll be together.th more i help her th more i seem t like her.so i decided nt to cuz i dun wan t put myself into a deeper hole.hopefully she'll be able t get through it la.i oso dunno wd t say t myself la.im gg t try forget abt her.i noe its goin t be hard bt stil yeah.


so im gna stop here so seeya folks another time.


-ciaoboats

briann'

ok back t blogging again.rather sian nw.past few days nvr blog was too tired t.


alrites shall start on monday.ermmm wen t th stall as usual den did th same thing again den wen t town t caseygreg's hse den wen t ttsh t visit his grandma n den wen t kovan.played a few games of dota.den elvin wen home wif me den was supposed t ton somewhr bt as usual it got screwed up n yeah so talk cock wif him til 3 plus den wen t slp as we had t go t skul n do CIP.

so yeah tuesday elvin had a hard time waking me up i delayed like 1 hr plus den met up wif xw at pasir ris den wen t skul.den started doin wif xianwen elvin leo n yatty.do like 1hr plus den greg dhar n jia came.so we splitted up den me greg jia wen t one room.den blasted th music like siao den i was singing some hokkien song den phaaap mrs. xiao was behind me felt damn malu la.ohwells so yeah cleaned n cleaned den wen t town t play a few games of dota den yeah slacked n slacked.den was deciding t go MOS anot cuz jiayi culd giv us free tickets. was quite sian abt it den yeah slack slack think think fr awhile den yeah slacked fr awhile den decided nt t pangseh xw den wen t weihoe's hse.before stepping into his hse his dog rushed out n barked like siao la.was quite scared lol bt after awhile th dog kept quiet.after tht we wen down played some soccer til ppl upstairs asked us t stop.perspired like fuck la was like dripping wet den dried up n walked t th coffeeshop t hv supper den saw some guailan nerds.wanted t tio wif them bt greg asked me t stop so yeah didnt in th end.so yeah den cam called me.hahah fun fun.told her i was at MOS cuz i tot she didnt go out den phaaap she was there.so i told her i was in th club n was dancing.hahaha den passed th phone t casey n casey said tht we were on a vip table n was at th north entrance n had a lampost sign called lorong liput.den couldnt tank n then laughed den she was like fuckin furious n yeah den hanged up.so after awhile we wen bak up bathed den casey n i wen t th staircase as we couldnt smoke in his hse.so two of us talked n talked frm like 2 plus til like 4 plus.didnt nw we talked so long la.had a good talk shared both of our family problems,he didnt noe some of th things n yeah.den greg came out den oso talked t him fr awhile den yeah we oso shared both of our problems.den talked n talked den jia n isaac came.den yeah stopped cuz we didnt wan many ppl t noe abt it n wanted t keep it t ourselves.so yeah talk cock fr awhile den wen bak t th hse took a 30min nap den left wif casey.den took a cab sent him home den talked on th way t his hse.he was fucking worried abt whether he was gna retain.told him nt t be so pessimistic cuz theres always some1 lousier than him which is me.so yeah asked him t rest a few hours n nt t tink so much n charge up some energy t tok t lao ng later in th morning.so yeah den i headed home den immediately had t leave fr th market den did th same thing again etc.so called yeah msged casey n wished him all th best.den he msged me bak"gime a cal before i die"so yeah called him den he told me tht he retained,fr a moment was fucking shocked den he said fuck u n he promoted!seeing him promote makes me feel happy.bt den it shows me hw useless am i.well well.den after lunch was too tired n juz slept on th table slept til like 7 plus.den woke up hv dinner den wen home.den slacked watched tv den yeah blogging n chatting online nw.dunno wd time im gna sleep.

so yeah im stil thinking of her at tis point of time.aiyah dunno wd t say la really feel fucking stupid la.like her so much bt everytime i see her i got nth t say.sian la.n yeah dunno why i stil like her noeing so many times tht its nt gg t be possible.dunno la sian la.wah!I REALLY DO LIKE HER LA!sian la fuck la.
got alot of tots gg on in my mind nw.knn sian1/2 oso dunno wd t do nw la.father as usual giving my mom problems.feel like ending his fucking miserable life n end all of our miseries.den hv t wait almost a month more til th n lvl results come out.really scared tht i cant make it bt stil yeah expecting th worse n hoping fr th best.wonder whether 2006 wuld be my last yr in barker or wd.if i leave i wuld really miss all my frens there.hopefully i can make it ba.dunno whr i'll end up after dec18.really feeling damn fuckedup nw.haiz.den oso dunno wen wil things improve fr my family.thinking t walk a path tht i asked my frens nt t walk before alot of times.its gna be stupid n ruining my future bt as long as it makes quick n fast bucks fr my family i dun mind.

ok i shall end here today.gotta sleep so yeah.

-ciaoboats=)

okok yeah dunno why im stil up at tis time.supposed t be like sleeping nw bt yeah cant seem t though.so yeah gna blog.

so ok past two days been working at th warehouse sale at expo.lets start wif thursday.ok reported at th expo at 830 even though was supposed t report at 9 n yeah.so yeah slacked arnd den yeah started work.th expo was bloody hot,th aircon wasnt turned on so yeah everyone there was drippin wet.so yeah juz carried n packed books th whole day,surprisingly didnt feel shag at all.den yeah 4 plus trade ppl came in th shop as it was onli a preview.so yeah worked n worked n gotta noe a few ppl here n there.reach home bathe,watch tv den wen t slp.

so yeah today waked up earlier t hv breakfast at home n watched a little bit of sunwukong n yeah wen t work again.well today wasnt as hot as ytd.n yeah wen th doors open fr business ppl came in like ants.didnt expect so many ppl though cuz its was th first day.so yeah though aircon was turned on at den bt its better than nth.n yeah move stuff here n there help customers carry books n yeah.n yeah one customer gav me tips fr helping her carry.was surprised though bt yeah.didnt wan t acc bt she forced it t me so yeah i accepted it.so yeah been moving arnd today rather than packing bks n at least wen packing books can sit.today feel damn shag.legs damn tired,wen gt a chance t sit down i wuld try to.hahah lol.so yeah worked n worked n every1 keeps asking me whether im ok anot,dunno why though cuz they said tht i was looking very bad.nw havin a cold so yeah drinking hell lots of water.n yeah worked n den wen home n bathed den watched tv n den yeah came online t chat. so yeah til nw dunno why cant slp so yeah decided t blog.

okok so yeah stil dunno why keep thinking of her its really damn damn cock la.keep tellin myself tht everyday bt yeah dont really seem t get tht tot off.its really damn stupid la like her alot noeing tht its nt possible.tsktsk dunno why am i stil doin tis after such a long time.so yeah juz kept thinking of her n yeah.so yeah gna juz juz keep it tis way. haiz.


so yeah dunno wd t blog oredy so gna juz end here fr tday.
so take care t all th ppl tht has been viewing my blog.

-tanks

--ciaoboats=)

hellos hellos.


yeah once again i bak t bloggin th past few days.feel tht bloggin sorta helps relieves my mind,dunno why though.

so yeah doin th thing i usually do.wake up go market,den go mom's stall den slp fr awhile den wake up do delivery den help out.tday daytime business was good again.made arnd th same amount on monday frm th lunch crowd.notice tht everytime if i take a nap durin th mornin business wuld be gd.sounds pretty stupid though bt yeah.den yeah afternoon took lunch den wen t th kitchen n continued practising holding th wok.gotta say its darn tiring doin tht,really requires ure wrist n finger power.so yeah practiced den do delivery fr th evening crowd den yeah i bak home nw bloggin.
its really damn weird seein my hse so empty,really hv alot of tots tht words cant express.dunno wd t do nw.bt yeah juz thinking n thinking.dunno wd t do actually.ohwells one of th worst thing t happen has oredy been gone.nw gotta wry fr my n lvl results,monetary problems,n yeah finding a job oso.well well juz gotta accept th problems n TRY t take thing into my stride lol.
n yeah stil dunno y i can think of her.do i really like her tht much or wd?its really really damn dumb,noeing tht it wont work out bt stil i like her darn lot.its fuckin stupid la.haiz i really dunno la its damn brain pasa siao la.gotta really think it out properly.everyday try n tel myself t get over it bt cant seem t achieve tht.i tink tht im like maybe crazy? over her.aiyo.dunno wd t say oso la.
alrites i shall stop here fr today once again.

-ciaoboats=))

so fast time passes n today is nov 14th.which means tis is th day tht almost all of my hse furniture has been taken away by th bank.things tht werent supposed t be taken away was also taken away.th tv n washing machine,th bank fuck care anyhow take den yeah juz took it.so yeah my broinlaw had t spend 800 dollars buyin it bak.he was supposed t go t th court fr some hearing bt den th wasnt any letter.so yeah it must be my fucking fucked up father who threw his letters away.really wonder why th fuck he did tht.oredy nt helping out much at th stall n causing all th unecessary problems fr tis family why must he do tis kind of things?culdnt take it n wen t th bak n cried.felt really sry t th whole family tht MY FATHER must do all these things.wanted t juz end his life n end all our miseries den.its really tiring n sad t see my family in tis state.its really damn fuckin sian t see tis damn fuckin sian.haaaaaaaaaaaaaaiz.sian1/2.

ok lets get on wif my life th past 2 days.monday was hell of a good business in th afternoon,earned like 550,so yeah tot income fr th day wuld be gd bt den phaap at nite damn little ppl.hahah ohwells.so yeah afternoon continued t learn hw t cook,nw juz learning th basics like holding th wok n stuff.damn tiring la bt dun mind learning it as i anws i hv too much free time there. so yeah wen home bathed den went online check mails,frenster n blog.den talked t jia fr a while den phaap go sleep.

den today did th same thing bt business was bad.didnt hv much customers although there were two stalls tht werent open.so well basically did th same thing practiced holding th wok n stuff.so yeah end of th day we juz broke even n yeah went home.on th way home i was thinkin hw my hse wil look like after th furniture is gone.tot n tot n yeah finally reached home.reached home my hse looked damn empty,was really damn sad n yeah got alot of things tht i wanted t say bt kept it t myself.had alot of tots wen i juz reached home.had alot alot of thoughts.really damn tired nw,hope tht luck wuld change fr th better nw onwards.so yeah nw bloggin here.dunno wd t do.wished tht i culd do many things i wanted bt den yeah.haiz.


ok i shall stop here fr today.

-ciaoboats

so fast time passes n today is nov 14th.which means tis is th day tht almost all of my hse furniture has been taken away by th bank.things tht werent supposed t be taken away was also taken away.th tv n washing machine,th bank fuck care anyhow take den yeah juz took it.so yeah my broinlaw had t spend 800 dollars buyin it bak.he was supposed t go t th court fr some hearing bt den th wasnt any letter.so yeah it must be my fucking fucked up father who threw his letters away.really wonder why th fuck he did tht.oredy nt helping out much at th stall n causing all th unecessary problems fr tis family why must he do tis kind of things?culdnt take it n wen t th bak n cried.felt really sry t th whole family tht MY FATHER must do all these things.wanted t juz end his life n end all our miseries den.its really tiring n sad t see my family in tis state.its really damn fuckin sian t see tis damn fuckin sian.haaaaaaaaaaaaaaiz.sian1/2.

ok lets get on wif my life th past 2 days.monday was hell of a good business in th afternoon,earned like 550,so yeah tot income fr th day wuld be gd bt den phaap at nite damn little ppl.hahah ohwells.so yeah afternoon continued t learn hw t cook,nw juz learning th basics like holding th wok n stuff.damn tiring la bt dun mind learning it as i anws i hv too much free time there. so yeah wen home bathed den went online check mails,frenster n blog.den talked t jia fr a while den phaap go sleep.

den today did th same thing bt business was bad.didnt hv much customers although there were two stalls tht werent open.so well basically did th same thing practiced holding th wok n stuff.so yeah end of th day we juz broke even n yeah went home.on th way home i was thinkin hw my hse wil look like after th furniture is gone.tot n tot n yeah finally reached home.reached home my hse looked damn empty,was really damn sad n yeah got alot of things tht i wanted t say bt kept it t myself.had alot of tots wen i juz reached home.had alot alot of thoughts.really damn tired nw,hope tht luck wuld change fr th better nw onwards.so yeah nw bloggin here.dunno wd t do.wished tht i culd do many things i wanted bt den yeah.haiz.


ok i shall stop here fr today.

-ciaoboats

yeah hellos today was quite a okay day.business was so-so juz made enough t cover up costs which is nt tht good.so yeah these few days been tokin cock wif th chefs durin our break.their quite funny.damn nice ppl.talk t them fr quite a while n found out a little abt their background.so yeah tot i learnin hw t cook frm them.quite interested bt i noe it'll be tough cuz th wok is mother heavy bodoh.hahah well they are th experienced ones so yeah learn frm them a little here n there wuld be good.

so yeah basically thts my day today helpin out at mom's stall gettin th usual scolding frm her n tokin wif th chefs.

ermmm i oso dunno wd t write oredy cuz dun really wna go t th slightest detail of wd i did.

still yeah another day has passed n tmr's friday.didnt actually realise tht today was thurs.so yeah as days go by many things are goin t happen,confiscation of property,redemption of it,havin t work at th expo n th most impt n lvls.well well gotta face all tis shit sooner or later so yeah nth much i can really do nw bt t see n wait fr th results.

hopefully i'll be able t find a job soon.dunno whether i shud go out t work or continue helpin my mom out at th stall.quite a hard decision t make.

many things tht i wish could come thru doesnt though lol.well well its juz life n things cant really go ure way all th time.so yalah.juz gotta push ureself on day by day n hope fr th best bt prepare fr th worst.hahah sounds fuckin contradicting.


so as usual at th stall gt free time she wil juz pop up into my mind n yeah.still quite sian cuz i keep thinkin tht it wuld be possible between us bt noeing tht its nt.another contradicting statement there again.hahah.so dunno wen wil she be off my mind.juz need some time though.bt still yeah i really do like her alot alot n in a way i juz cant get her out of my head.AIYOH.sian sian sian sian sian sian sian sian.wd t do lol.


ok i shall stop here fr today.so yeah seeya all another time.

-zaijian=))

heheh.cant believe im actually up t post.quite tired nw as i hv a lack of slp fr th past few wks.many problems t face etc.

bt yeah lets start wif monday.wen t town t meet greg,on th way there isaac called n asked whether wna go fishin,was rather surprised bt yeah told him t follow us go marina south t slack.so yeah reached town at 330 wanted t play a game of dota bt greg scolded me as we were late.greg n i wen t th footcourt t meet casey passed him a textbk n a few notes n wen off as isaac had reached.so we wen t meet helmy,yat n jotham.played a few games of dota den they wen t bowl n den we had dinner at some buffet some thingy.although th food wasnt tht fantastic bt stil was quite a gd bargain t eat there.after tht we slacked n yeah each of us headed our own way home.

past 2 days as usual wen t my mom's stall doin th usual stuff.blah blah.business has been constant n thts good bt stil yeah theres stil alot of problems yet t be solved.

so yeah stil hv t worry abt my n lvl results dun really noe whr i wuld really end up i i were t fuck up.dunno whether i shud start t work n do my little part fr tis family or try t achieve a higher education n hv a better job.,family's financial state,lookin fr jobs n stil alot more are stil big problems..at least one of th problems hv been solved,luckily business turned fr th better or else there wuldnt really be any bright side t look forward t.

well i noe tis is goin t be one of th hardest transition period fr my family n especially me.tis period wuld really put me t test n hopefully i wil pull through.no doubt no doubt its goin t be hard bt no matter wd i stil gotta face it.at least things are changing fr th better a little bit fr th moment eh.hahah.

few days back i was browsing thru my photo folder,reminded me of many many fond memories.everytime i look into it,it really reminds me of th bonding n friendship tht i hav wif my frens.though i may say i hate tis person tht is shaunchua bt everytime i look at th photoes it reminds me of th quality time we spent together be it thru bad or good.everytime i say i wan t whack him bt stil in my heart i dun tink i hav heart t even lift tht hand up t hurt him.no doubt we hav drifted apart since we last fell out a few months bak,bt stil i really do cherish tis guy as a fren or rather as a younger brother.his adorable laughs wuld nvr fail t cheer me up.i admit i do regret of some of th things i did t him in th past bt stil i only hav his interests in my heart.i really do nt noe wd has become of him fr th past 2 months bt i hope tht he has really changed fr th better.hope t see him soon though,tried callin his hp bt yeah it was turned off.

another person tht reminds me of fond memories is casey.tis fat bugger no doubt he may be full of his nonsense bt he never fails t be th one there fr me wen i nd some t tok t.both of us hv gone thru thick n thin.few times we had some arguments n yeah at those times i felt tht was th end of our frenship.bt den yeah in th end we stil continued t be really good frens.theres many times tht i was really down he was th only one tht took time out t accompany me n talk t me,likewise vice versa.i do nt noe hw t tank tis guy,really do treat him as a brother although we may nt be related by blood.i really hope tis frenship wuld last til both of us hav graduated frm barker,started our own familys etc.

greg,tis guy ah hahahah i do nt noe wen t start.though we dun really go out together tht often bt stil i oso regard him one of my closest frens.he's sort of th "matured" one in th grp n yeah th one always givin advice.he too was one of th ppl tht is part of tis good memory.hahah i do nt noe wd t say abt him,he may be a idiot most of th times bt wen it comes t serious matters he noes whr t draw th line n make a wise decision.

domtye tis cb hes one irritating fucker.bt stil tis guy is one hell of a fren.though he may be nonsensical bt no matter wd he wuld help u.few times tis guy helped me in alot of things.though he may nt be th type tht can giv u advice stil he can be a very good listener if u nd one.oso dunno hw t tank tis guy.

okay theres too many ppl t write abt bt i shall stop here fr today.bt all in all i wuld really wanna tank all my frens tht hv been there fr me wen i really needed help.
thank u all!

ciaoboats!

finally im awake t blog n my internet is kong enough.ok past few days was quite busy at th stall.business was much better than usual.theres one day tht i tot th wuld nt be any business.so i tot n tot den wen th time i reached bak my mom's stall after a delivery theres a order of 60packets.pheew luckily th luxasia ppl ordered nt we wuld be losing money again.den yeah past few days as usual in th morning i wil take a nap til 11 plus den start t help out cuz thts th time wen th crowd comes in.
den on one of th days i kena th shengshiong supermarket girl.she was fuckin unreasonable den yeah juz nice my mood wasnt like perfect so yeah i juz scolded her n almost wanted t slap her bt my mom stopped me.i keep wondering why she always stops me frm doin these kind of things.some ppl are obviously kiam pa bt den she keeps stopping me so yeah.
den yeah one nite i stayed over caseygreg's grandmother's chalet haha we played mahjong th whole nite.casey was sleepin away den it was left wif me yatty greg n xw den phaaaap halfway yatt oso wen t slp so daryl took over. den we played till like 7plus n den i had t leave t help my mom so yeah.after tht during th evening i wen bak t th chalet again.casey's father picked me up frm my mom's stall den yeah we made our way there.den lepark leparked here n there den yeah i went home like 11plus.
den today i helped till like 2 plus den wen t town t meet up wif casey n th rest.we played a few games n yeah den i had t return t th stall.dom accompanied me yeah n we talked cock fr awhile den yeah DOMINIC had t go home so sent him t th bus stop.den yeah walked bak t my moms stall den waited fr awhile den went home.
few days bak i saw th letter frm th bank stating of th seizure of property in my hse.was quite confused on wd t do.i tink im gg t use th money tht i intend t go t austinhills t buy bak all th basic furniture.although it may be a sacrifice bt yeah i hav t do it.seeing my mom face wen she saw th letter really hurts me her face was full of troubles.haiz.hah wd t do.hopefully th situation wuld really change in th NEAR future.dun tink my mom can take any of such pressure anymore.
so yeah thts basically wad ive been doin th past few days.hahah rather boring bt den again i dun mind doin it as long as it helps my mom.though most of th times or some of th times she may be unreasonable bt stil blood is thicker than water so yalah thing can help must help.im her son so yeah i mean i cant leave her out there t struggle alone.no matter wad kind of problems i believe as a family we can solve it.
wahahahah i stil cant believe it tht im still thinkin of th person i like at tis moment lol.although i noe its nt possible bt i stil keep thinkin of her.really do like her alot noe ing tht its nt gg t work out.wtf man lol.dun actually noe wtf is wrong wif me lol.i tink i really need some time off.its really troubling me.everyday without fail i wuld tink of her out of a sudden.there some major pasa wif my brain la.hahah lol.

alrite alrite i shall stop here fr today. so yeah see ya guys whos reading my blog some other time!
-zhaoboats

brian lin shixian, 21051990 acs junior,acs barker, SHATEC DCS 408B !
dota,sports,cooking,slacking,stoning


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